Saturday, September 23, 2017
Never have I felt such Sorrow. My Life Force is drained. I see not the Point of taking another breath. For what is there to Fight for? I stagger along, Numb and Dazed. Dear reader, if these words ever come to light, Pray your planet never reaches such a point. A darkness has Descended over our world. We stand abandoned in the Universe. I cannot bear the Shame of what we've done. I'm ready to find a rock, sit down, and Die. I've just been Kidding myself, a member of the walking dead after all. I always knew this Day would come, I just couldn't face it.
In the Green Zones they are celebrating - even if it does mean their own death. The Wind Riders flew over us, pointing out the dangers they saw below and the dangers they saw coming. The Power Lords bristled at the Riders' words. Reverence for the Riders undermined their base. They Twisted and Perverted the deeds of the Riders, declaring them enemies, that it is not doing evil that is Wrong, but to have it pointed out is Wrong. They stoked their followers to a Fever pitch, blaming the Riders for the Ills in their lives. Oh, the Lords are crafty in their Deceit, bemoaning every Rider murdered while stoking the Flames against them. There is no way Forward with treachery like that.
I see the Green Zoners sitting on comfortable cushions with earnest eyes closed, praying to the gods of Selfishness so they their Way of life may continue unabated. Anyone or anything that Opposes their comfort is declared evil. When the Wind Riders warned of the deforestation that led to the first Dead Zone, their days were Numbered. I see that now all too Clearly. The 'Holy People' put a contract out on them then called it the will of God. But the words of the Riders were my last Link to hope. As long as Truth is being expressed we still have a Chance. No one is left to Challenge the liars as they grow Conceited and openly Push people around.
I'm ready to take my Rest, and let Nature take her revenge.
Friday, September 08, 2017
Days of Rain and Laughter
Where the Beginning
Is as good as After
That's a part of a Poem I wrote long ago, in the before times: before the we lost the sun behind eternal Brown Clouds, before we ramped up the War Machine as in the Old World, before we became Two instead of One. These phrases have been long forgotten to me, as if washed down a Stream. It's unpleasant to think of what we've Lost. But I overheard some Green Zones kids laughing in the Face of love. I knew just from the Sound of their voices they had never put foot in a Dead Zone, their faith in their ignorance Unshakable. I instantly hated them, of course, but then I Remembered the poetry from my youth. It's simply too horrible to believe there's no Future.
Every face a Living smile
While our Cares are few
We love our Reckless style
But we have Precedence. We've Destroyed futures before with No Way Out. Coming to this Outpost was a thousand to one chance and six thousand years ago we Vowed we had learned our lesson. No more lucky strikes after this. We thought our success in getting a Second Chance was the hand of Destiny. We still repeat that Mantra to this day. And Feeling it's our destiny to survive we've then done nothing to Ensure it. It's like Jumping from a plane without a parachute, thinking why bother when you're Untouchable. Nature has no Mercy for fools.
Beware these seeds we're sowing!
We may not live carefree
Once we see what we've been growing
There is a great secret among us No One is allowed to speak or even give a Hint to. To allude to it in any way is like setting off a Bomb. It flips a Hidden Switch inside us, removing our Masks, unleashing Murderous savagery without thought, reason or Compunction. In other words, to Breathe is suicide. But every day it gets Harder to deny this secret. A consciousness hurls ever forward, unable to Unknow what's known. We sense that clock Ticking, hounding us, and to one day catch us, the Game over. But I will say it Now - easy for a doomed man to do. Despite our praise, and myths, and justice professed to be loved, we never did Repent.
Tuesday, May 16, 2017
My soul feels abandoned, pushed to the Edge of the universe. There's Nowhere I can turn. The sound of this Whistling wind, it's more terrifying, more lonely, more despairing than any Sound I've ever heard. What is there to fight For on this ravaged orb? It's as if we're Angry with the planet, outraged by its trying to Survive, that we must make it as Dead as we are for us to live. Through this desolation I Wander, horrified as never before.
I've seen destruction before, but this is on a new Level. There's almost a sense of Panic to it, that nothing can be left behind alive to bear Witness. But I do witness - and thus become enemy of the Power Lords simply by virtue of my sight. But to whom can I plea? Who can Hear my voice? This Apocalyptic feeling in which I Drown, who will ever know of it? And as we've seen before on old Earth, the Destroyers who are so desperate to Hide their dastardly deeds will one day destroy even themselves. Why do they Worry of witnesses?
I hear no hope in the sound of this whistling wind. No day passes without brown Chemical Clouds in the sky. The normal is to be Abnormal. When we first came to this outpost 6,000 years ago we Absolved ourselves. We knew Better. No way we destroy a second planet. But it seems Time has played us for Fools, that even as we quote the ideals of our original Founders it's only to give cover to our Betrayal. "Give us your Trust! You know we'd never repeat the mistakes of our Savage ancestors!" It became possible for us to wreck ourselves the minute we Decided it is Impossible to happen.
I don't even know why I keep this Journal. My first instinct was to document the Insanity and bring it to Light. But it's as if I've been Sobered dry by this nuclear wind. It makes me feel as if I've never been born. What's the point of Writing about a doomed world? Who is my audience? Realizing this has Forced me to consider just how Helpless I am. I'll be washed away, another dead body amid the abandoned industrial buildings so Toxic not even weeds can can grow. But I hope if some strange Alien does happen upon this diary someday when this orb is finally devoid of life, that you dear alien will Understand that if nothing else, I had to make a plea to the Universe.
Tuesday, May 31, 2016
It's something very few want to Talk about. It's bad enough we Destroyed one planet, what excuse can there be for Two? Gangs of Road Strikers live to terrorize once again just as they did Thousands of years ago. They Ride Out from the Green Zones to rape and pillage the Weak and Defenseless, feeling Entitled to their Taking because taking is what it's all about in this world. We like to Pretend we are something different than what we are but Desperation causes Revelation (all over again).
I've read a few Mock editorials bemoaning the rise of the Road Strikers but those writers are either disconnected from their own Part in the Criminality (giving themselves moral cover) or if genuine are Rebuked and Marginalized by the-powers-that-be as Hysterical and (ironically) Disconnected. But really, what can they Say? To admit we are going down the same road of Self-Annihilation as before is to admit Defeat and - worse - Responsibility. But by turning a Blind Eye we ensure the Strikers perpetuation.
What I also find Amusing are the self-laudatory pieces these type of events incur. Talk of how Great we were to start all over with the New Mandate, how brave our Ancestors were who fought for it - the Implication being we are still as great now as we were then. But we've passed the Crossroads where we either Commit to the Mandate or Sink into wholesale Selfishness which renders our previous principles Moot. The Mandate now is just words on Paper. We dream of a Past that never was to create the Illusion of a Present that does not exist.
Some say we must draw our weapons to Protect us against the raiding hordes of the Strikers. It's true these Beasts commit their Treachery with a ruthless relish, Seeing no crime in what they do, often repeating words of the Mandate as they rape! The Strikers love to Libel those in Need as the destroyers of Society even as these monsters burn houses with Families inside. But while guns may Kill a few of the them they cannot stop the Phenomenon of the Strikers or the underlying Mentality. Only Complete Condemnation by all of us can do that. But like I said, True Voices are few and far between - and those are Maligned and Minimized by the Mad Masses.
Saturday, March 26, 2016
When bombs go off in the Dead Zones they get no notice. But Green Zone bombings get Round The Clock coverage. Who are the bombers? Why do they do it? What do they hope to accomplish? Nobody. No reason. Nothing. All that really matters is the Frequency.
We know we are Dying. Everyone can see we are dying. No one actually Admits it. As we continue to Fray, the bombings increase. It is the Sorrow, and the Pity. They call them Cancer Cells as the bombers cluster together, Eating Away at society. Terror is their Lifeblood, their Addiction; they always need more. Even without the Random bombings, life here is terror. How else to describe a place with no Tomorrow?
The Entitlement of the Green Zoners gives them a license for Tyranny. They live in dire fear of the Evil they have Unleashed over the centuries. They believe that by calling themselves Good they can kill at Will any person they deem Bad. Their self-Paranoia devours them even without the Bombers to provide an Incarnate enemy. For the bombers, their bombs are their Words and Destruction their creed. Two sides of a coin Fighting one another in hopeless Deadlock.
I am not Immune to the Rage, our true Enemy. Many are those whose sole Dedication is keeping rage alive. Peace is the Provocation for their bombings. To them, if others Live they feel terrorized; Left Behind. While at the same time the Overlords feel terrorized by the Truth, waging war with Lies as Weapons. This is our Madness. As the Brown Clouds deepen in darkness, blocking the Sun, Draining our crops and Souls, we go ever more insane. How can we not?
What is Done is done because we each pursue the Path we believe will bring us Love.
Sunday, March 20, 2016
I was running down the road yesterday when I Stopped. I knew why I was running - no one can take a chance of coming across a Patrol Unit and having a Mind Scan done - but then it hit me. What am I running To? Realizing that Question caused me to Halt in my tracks. Nowhere. There's nowhere to go.
Part of me wanted to Lay Down and die right then and there. Truth is, that Feeling still lingers. I feel it will be with me until the End. The Green Zones shrink smaller every day. And the Viciousness to stay within them is as Brutal and Animalistic as anything we did in the Old World. It's Unbelievable that after having Ruined one planet we'd repeat it all over again. Only this time there's no near Star to bail us out. There's no more chances Left.
I won't say we came here with the best of Intentions (though most say otherwise). We were somewhat humbled and Scared of ourselves, but not Reborn. Secretly, we saw this as a Chance to try our old Ways once more, as if our previous Destruction had been nothing but bad luck. It was Deliberate then, it's Deliberate now. You see, we don't truly Believe there's another way but to Plunder. That's because we don't believe in Ourselves. And when you don't believe in yourself you Know you have No future. So the ideas of Preservation and Salvation become moot in your mind. May as well rape, murder and plunder for Tomorrow we Die.
Outside the Green Zones it's easy to see the Myopic Insanity. I feel it myself when I'm there. The Disconnects, the Denialists, the Destroyers, the Death Worshipers see the greenery and think they'll live forever. It's Overwhelming the desire to feel the Good Things will always be, that your Acts have meaning, and to Forget the soul-sucking doom of facing life on a Ghost Planet. I have wondered what Alien travelers will think once we make this world Uninhabitable too. Have other life forms done this or are we the mockery of the Universe?
So if I die Today, what of it? I could save a Thousand Lives only for them to face Ultimate Despair later. The things we need do to Keep Alive is what advances us down the road to Hell. The slow Starvation of a depleted planet is a memory that cannot be Undone. I Weep as I Walk. I stumble Forward but know not Why. Is it Possible there's any other place in the universe where Love is so Unrewarded?
Sunday, August 30, 2015
The latest Enforcers are call the New Strain. Born out of an Idea from the Supreme Power Lord who's so Tormented he can never Sleep, the enforcers are injected into Hyper activity until they drop dead. Dropping Dead on the job is also the new badge of Honor. Vacant souls line up for this latest Glory, praised by the Propagandists and Blessed by their mothers to be Good citizens. To admit they're Lunatics would be to admit our entire Society is lunatic.
The stories are horrific. Some recruits die Instantly with the first Injection. It's a rite of passage to survive it followed by a Ceremony of celebration. Those who die are privately sneered upon for not having what it takes; too Human. The Indoctrination is both mental and physical - even enforcers outside of the New Strain fear these Maniacs. Anyone caught finding life Precious is considered Weak and Inferior. Hell's hand reaches out from the Old World.
The Supreme Power Lord trolls among the troops to inspire them to even less Sleep. He fills their heads with Grand Visions that they are the ruling elite to be hailed by History. They do Savagery in the Name of right, playing this principle to the hilt. "He who Questions least is the greatest Patriot." This New Strain hates their enemy who Rests, rousting them in the night to Chambers without light or sound. Though they know the injections Shorten their life, the enforcers feel they have an Advantage over Ordinary souls who still seek sleep.
The longer the Waking period, the more willingly Heinous the crimes. Reality becomes Distorted: paranoia for Breakfast; Suicide for lunch. The misdeeds Infect them, driving them even further down the road of hyper Cruelty. There are rumors of those missing their injection time going stark raving Mad as Sobriety brings them back to Self-Awareness. It's also Rumored the Supreme Power Lord has the same blood Chemistry as the New Strain even having never taken an injection. He's kept awake by his Own Private Hell.
Who can see a Future in this? It's as if we're being Swallowed whole while no one Notices. These Fools speak of their Place in history, but who will be left Alive to even know we existed?